Consistency is Subjective

I’ve been working on writing this post for 3 weeks now. I’ve started and stopped a few different ways. 

I know what I want to offer here, but I struggled with just how to do it. 

The other day it finally came to me. 

I am not a self-help guru. I’m not even a self-help anything. Do I hope what I share with you does help you grow and learn and become a happier human? Absolutely. 

But to say I am a self-help expert, or coach, or any sort of authority figure would be a disservice to both of us. Because what I truly am is a mess. In the best sense of the word. 

I am not afraid to show up a little messy. I’m not afraid to show you the parts of me that aren’t quite figured out yet. I’m not afraid to share as I grow. 

Because I am not afraid to share myself, what I can offer you is perspective. A new way of seeing things. 

And what I want to share with you here is my perspective on consistency. Because I truly do think consistency is subjective. 

I, like most women in American, have worried about my weight my entire life. We’re told from a very young age that bigger bodies just aren’t as beautiful as smaller ones, with no real explanation of WHY. Then we spend the rest of our lives worrying if we meet the requirement of “small” to be considered beautiful. 

I’m also a person who has been working to build a business that would sustain me financially and fulfill me spiritually for nearly 15 years. 

And the way the world tells me to do both of those things is… yep. You guessed it; consistency. 

Exercise and eat right, every day. Put work in on your business every day. Consistency is key. If you don’t do a little every day you won’t succeed. Keep going even when it feels wrong, because consistency is what will get you there! Daily Action!

Now, no I don’t have a successful business I am able to work full-time instead of a “regular” job. No. I am also not currently at an ideal weight. (Thus the disclaimer at the beginning of this, LOL)

But what I am… is happy. Joyful. Confident and trusting in myself. And I got there by allowing myself to release other people’s definition of consistency. 

I could feel really bad about both my business and my weight. Because it is not something I actively work on every single day. I am not writing content or working on my next book or promoting current books daily. I am also sure as heck not working out everyday. 

I am still 100% consistent in both endeavors though. 

I am writing/sharing/promoting generally 3-4 days a week. Sometimes more, sometimes less. But always, something gets done. 

I am not eating the “correct” foods for every meal and snack. But I do make good food choices 4-5 days a week. Sometimes more. Sometimes Less. But always, some good choices are made. 

Working out… I work out 7-8 times a month. Sometimes more. Sometimes less. Could this area use some extra attention? Absolutely. But I am in a season of learning to work WiTH my natural energy cycles and part of that is honoring when my body asks for rest. 

Would I have better results in all of these areas if I made a strict schedule and regimen and stuck to it perfectly? Of course. 

Would I be miserable doing it that way? Of course. Because that’s not how I work. And, more important, it wouldn’t be sustainable. 

I am allowing myself to write my own definition of consistency. If I eventually bring my focus back to an area on a regular basis, then I am consistent. 

The actual definition of consistency is “acting or done in the same way over time.” Over time. No where does it say “must be done daily.”

I’ve allowed myself to think of consistency not in daily routine, but in the weekly, monthly, and yearly. It’s so easy to get discouraged when doing things daily is the goal. 

If you’re trying to workout every day, and you miss one day… you already feel like you failed. 

But if you’re trying to work out 3 times this week, if you miss Monday you still have 6 more chances to get it done. 

Or if you’re trying to work out 12 days this month, if you miss Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, you still have 27 more chances to get it right. 

So I offer you this, the same thing I have gifted to myself…

You have permission to decide what consistency looks like for you. 

Without guilt. Without shame. Without worry. 

Decide what consistency is for you, then do that. So you can stop beating yourself about not meeting someone else’s standard and live a little happier knowing you’re still making progress.

Love you big,

Jessi